As bad a rep as the sugar relationship may have, it can be a great way to improve yourself and increase your opportunities in this world.
On the other hand, it could also be a segue-way to a life spent in servitude.
The only thing separating these two is the mindset you have as a sugar baby.
Search your motivations right now. Do you recognize any glimpse of the moocher mentality? Well, get rid of it ’cause it’ll be detrimental not only to your sugar relationship but your entire life.
Before we excise it from your consciousness, let’s define it.
A moocher mentality is one in which you constantly seek to get something out of someone else who has created it, instead of learning to create it for yourself.
It’s a mentality in which you do not ever plan on getting rid of the middleman that separates you from what you want, be it wealth, or status, or worldliness.
It’s a mentality that wants the fish, but cannot be bothered to learn how to fish.
Let me make a key distinction before I progress: every one of us mooches at some point in our lives, be it off our parents, other guardians, friends, mentors, whatever. The difference between a successful person and a servile moocher is the desire that the mooching be ONLY A MEANS TO AN END. The end being, naturally, the ability to create whatever you want by yourself.
Some sugar babies don’t want to abandon the moocher mentality. And it’s not surprising since it’s possible for a moocher to do very well for him/herself. If you’re young, gorgeous and charming, you could live very comfortably off men who would be willing to support you.
But if you’re not using your temporary beauty and charm to create something more lasting for yourself, you’re in for the lifestyle of a typical junkie: a continuous cycle of looking for your next hit.
If you’re comfortable with the temporary ease of a moocher lifestyle, this blog is not for you.
On the other hand, if you’re a sugar baby who someday wants to be her own sugardaddy:
Adjust your focus.
What do you want from this sugar relationship? Let’s say you want to travel. Is it simply for the allure of staying in a 5-star resort somewhere beach-y? Or do you want to learn more about the world outside of America?
Most sugar daddies will want to make you happy. They’ve already been around the world, already sampled haute cuisine. And thankfully, most will let you choose what you want to do or where you want to go.
Take full advantage of this, not to simply splurge and live large, but to learn as much as you can out of the experience. Suggest a vacation in a place where you can actually sample the culture there or learn a new skill in the process. He’ll pay for your scuba certification, your wine course, etc. Make sure you take away more from a vacation than hotel soaps or memories, be sure to ask for something that improves you.
Establish an exit plan.
Being a sugar baby can be fun and easy. I spent the first 3 – 4 months of my time as a sugar baby doing mostly nothing productive. I procrastinated. I socialized. I shopped. I read fiction for hours at cafes. But, throughout this entire time, the nagging exit plan stayed on my mind.
An exit plan is simply the length of time you want the sugar relationship to last for. This is also a great way of ensuring your sugar relationship doesn’t fizz out in a short time. The length of time should be set according to the time you think it will take you to accomplish certain goals + save for the future. In the very beginning, I set my sugar exit to take place in exactly one year. That was the length of time I calculated to be necessary to work toward certain goals necessary for my future as well as save enough money to be able to survive at least one year without any help from anyone. I cannot stress enough the importance of an emergency fund.
Even as the lure of an easy-breezy sugar baby lifestyle tempts you, an exit plan will keep you focused. By establishing one in advance with your sugar daddy, you have the constant awareness that it’s only a matter of time before you have no income coming in.
An exit plan serves to remind you that you will not be a sugar baby forever and need to focus your energy and time into becoming your own sugar daddy.