I don’t know who the original voice behind this quote is, but I have to say – they were dead on.
Throughout my year of being a sugar baby, this was one of the most important rules to follow. Men in general tend to like feminine women – they like grace, they love softness, playful coquetry will leave them eating out of your hands.
The downside is that femininity often gets walked on. Even the most feminine women need to have a trace of “masculinity” in them.
Remember that when I talk about femininity and masculinity here, I’m referring mostly to the stereotypical traits and behaviors usually associated with these two gender characteristics.
I found that in sugar dating – and in dating as well – it helps to be a woman who knows how to think like a man. In appearances, gestures, and mannerisms, feminism is key. I keep my hair long, soft, and wavy. I don’t wear too much make up. I dress like a woman. I smile when I speak. I put a lot of weight in flowy hand gestures. I color my sentences with pretty adjectives. I don’t cuss.
But there’s a masculine aspect to me and one that I nurture just as well. I am constantly developing my own opinions. Whatever the topic is – I have an opinion on it. I won’t go so far as to voice my opinions on anything and everything, but you can rest assured that if you ask – I’ll have something to tell you, with a smile, of course.
I also nurture my assertiveness. This is one of the main difference between men and women, even today. Men ask for what they want. They don’t really go into complicating calculations of whether they deserve it or not. They just go for it. I think one of the biggest differences between men and women is that women underestimate themselves and therefore don’t dare to ask for what they want whereas men overestimate themselves and will easily ask for what they want (since they think they more than deserve it).
Being a soft, feminine women who can come right out and ask for exactly what she wants is sheer power. Use it!
Lastly, one of the most helpful masculine traits I am still growing in myself is this: Don’t think.
I know this is a bit stereotypical, but it’s kinda true. Men don’t really think. They apply their brains when it’s really necessary but they don’t spend a lot of time analyzing little questions like, “Is she losing interest in me?” “What if I messed that up?” “OMG, did I hurt her feelings?”
It’s usually us women who spend a lot of our valuable mental resources fretting over ridiculous hypothetical questions like those above. Practice just letting it go, keeping your mental space clear of that crappy clutter and concentrating your mental prowess in simply…getting. what. you. want.